AN APPLE A DAY . . . .
Mommie has gone off the deep end – she is trying to get me to eat apples. Apples are for mice, not cats. I don't care if she eats one every day, but not me. Even Patches has turned up his
nose against the apples. Mommie says they are good for the body – maybe hers, but not my taste buds.
She keeps saying “An Apple A Day Keeps The Doctor Away.” Of course, the doctor doesn't come to the house! So I guess
she may be right.
I like to think “A Hiss A Day Keeps Patches Away.” Ha ha. Besides being a low-down snitch, Patches has bad breath. Everyone wonders why I hiss at him. Its because I don't want to smell his horrible breath.
Although the hiss does keep his bad breath away, it also gives me POWER. Patches is afraid of me!!!
Mommie you do your apple and I'll do my hiss, OK?
FOOT IN MOUTH DISEASE
Mommie and one of
her friends were discussing a mutual acquaintance. Mommie said “our friend Joe really has a bad case of 'foot in mouth disease'. Do you know he said something to his girlfriend that he had promised not to tell anyone? Blah, blah blah. . . . “
I hope this disease does not carry over to cats because I put my foot in my mouth every day. I LIKE to put my foot in my mouth. And, I haven't heard Patches or Big Mouth say anything bad about my habit. Of course, they could be talking behind
my back and I wouldn't know it.
I wonder what the disease looks like when it happens. I put my sweet feet in my mouth every day because I like to wash my feet. It would be awful if I got it. Does it cause a rash? Does it itch? How long
does it last?
Too many questions. I am going to have to trust Mommie that she will take care of it if I get it.